WTF

I've had enough..

Clearly, there's something wrong here... When I got this job here, I thought I was finally be able to say - 'Well, I guess everything's alright now' Maybe, I would be able to enjoy my life for a while.. Maybe, just maybe, I won't have to live under uncertainties anymore... at least not for a couple of years...

Well it only lasts two months..

It seems that EVERYBODY would have to gamble to work here from now on.. I don't understand.. Would companies still have the eagerness to hire foreign workers? Introducing the 29 months OPT extension would surely make some people happy... at least for now... but what's gonna happen next year? A lot of my friends are relieved that they got the 17 months extension and they were sorry for me as my OPT already expired. Sorry for me? Why? I could still stay in school and have the same timeline as you!!! I will be $10k poorer, sure.. but money's not an object now..

My question is: If you don't get it this year, what makes you think you're gonna get it next year?

Probability is just plain bullshit.. Probability only matters if you get picked.. this thing only happen once a year.. so you either get it.. or you don't! Would people that don't get pick will still be glad that we have more chance to get in than the bachelors? Same thing as 50-50 chance in my opinion..

I thought I was gonna use my H1 for a couple of years... maybe ask the company to sponsor me a Green Card.. and after several years of service in my company, my salary would surely be enough to get a mortgage for a decent house/apt.. you know, get settled... all of the good stuff..

But somehow this whole mess has changed my mind.. do I really want to do that? I was reading this thing that my sister gave me... it says

"the moment that you feel comfortable is the moment that you're dead" (or something like that.. the website is down at the moment... so I couldn't quote it perfectly)

When I read that sentence for the first time, I thought it was going the other way... but honestly, do you really want to have the same job years after years (by 'same' I didn't meant with the same company, but same as in wake up in the morning, have a 30 mins to 1 hour commute, 8-5 jobs, go home, watch tv, sleep, repeat kind of thing) have a life partner, get married, have kids, get a house, have a vacation every now and then.. year after year..

Bored yet?

Wedding really scares me.. It really does.. (so much for getting a girlfriend at this point eh? ^^) I'm also not looking forward for my wife to suffer for nine months pregnancy, then suffer through the birth process.. really, it really scares me... There's a lot of abandoned kids in this world, why couldn't we just adopt them? I mean, what's the difference.. really? anyway, what a way to scare up women huh...? ^^

Yes, I got all of these just because of all of this mess regarding H1 visas.. My friend kept updating me about the process... I wrote him back "I don't really give a damn about this anymore man... I'll start to worry when I don't get in.."

As for now I'm gonna get back doing what I'm really good at these past couple of months..

...Waiting...